“Embracing the strength and vulnerability it takes to rise up from a fall or failure or pain and grow stronger makes us a little dangerous
People who don’t stay down after falling, failing or hurt are often troublemakers, hard to control, which is the best kind of dangerous possible. They re the artists, the innovators and the change makers”
How much or how little we value emotion comes from what we taught and what we valued growing up, either:
Maybe we were raised believing that being emotional is weakness
Maybe we grew up with “don’t ask, don’t tell” ie: keep it to yourself
Maybe we don’t know how to express it verbally because we were never taught the words so we make fun of it
Maybe we taught that talking about emotion is a waste of time and amounts to nothing
Maybe we heard “That doesn’t apply to people like us”
Maybe we are so numb (suppressed) that we don’t think there is anything to discuss
Maybe we are so uncertain as to what it is and what it may provide, we simply don’t talk about it - superstition
Maybe we grew up believing that talking about emotion may teach us something we don’t want to know - growth is negative
Growing up I was always curious about everything, “why” helped me better understand the actions, behaviours and outcomes of others. It helped me learn, achieve, focus, avoid, believe and ultimately it became both how I would define myself and how I could identify opportunity in growing beyond how I defined myself. I always wanted ‘more’, to be more, provide more, do more, have more, show more.
That others didn’t believe in me, support me, teach me, encourage me only reflected their own inhibitions and fears and whilst this taught me to do the same, the choice and awareness remains mine not theirs. The responsibility is mine.
I am not alone in my experiences of disappointment, letdown, hurt, hope and failure, promise and avoidance, these are common amongst most people, potentially all people.
When we allow this to define us, we are limited to their teachings, we are limited to another persons voice, beliefs and outcomes. When we are prepared to ask “why” without fear of ridicule, laughter, ignorance or depletion, we create the opportunity to grow and we shall.
Embracing the strength to be vulnerable is the greatest gift we may present ourselves when it comes to growth. Define it however you choose, the outcome is the same
When we feel low or lost or helpless or angry or frustrated or confused, there are a number of options that are easier than engaging with people:
We can buy into peoples criticisms and stay completely withdrawn
We can plan how we wi