"Risk! Risk anything! Care no more for the opinions of others, for those voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth" -Katherine Mansfield
There are too many people living in pain who instead of feeling, observing and responding to their pain, are instead acting out on their pain, inflicting it onto others.
Instead of acknowledging pain, embracing failure or risking more, they are choosing to hide, live life disappointed and hurt. Their hurt then transfers into their relationships, at home, at work, amongst their family and friends.
It becomes the virus (dis-ease) that spreads.
They are choosing to live this part of their life in secrecy and shame, distorting the truth, deflecting support and opportunity, generalising opposition and seeing negativity as a victim instead of the potential victor.
Success is never guaranteed. It is also personal and not comparative.
Bob Dylan said:
“What is success ? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do”
Albert Einstein wrote:
“Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value”
When a person avoids pain by focusing on diminishing another in favour of spotlighting themselves or avoiding the spotlight for fear of ‘being found out’; when they posture for position or title or promote themselves in favour of each, they are already in the position of pain and doing all they can to avoid it.
Anger reflects sadness, it is an impossible emotion by itself.
Joy reflects surrender, gratitude and embracing another. Fear and isolation is it’s opposite.
Communication, consideration, compassion are our only means of moving forward, our only means of living completely.
When we see difficulty, we see one or more of these missing so how do we respond to this ? How do we step forward and support one another or ourselves if it is our experience ?
We see this experience in our children, in schools, in the workplace and in our relationships. We label it and state it is not acceptable yet it continues, we create systems and procedures yet it continues, we acknowledge mental health statistics, recruitment and retention expenses, motivation and succession planning deficits and yet it continues.
The reason is always inclusion in the face of fear.
There is a reason why the rate of marriage has decreased in the last 10 years universally, it reflects the decline in emotional communication and connection and an increase in fear, isolation (labelled independence) and the avoidance of pain.
When we begin to a