How do we know when to let go of someone ?
How do we know when to look after ourselves and when do we start being the positive example for others ?
Home - Work - Friends & Family
One quick self assessment when it comes to measuring and deciding when to let go after you’ve done everything you can to help a person grow includes considering & comparing the following to your experience:
Many people hold on too long hoping for change that never comes or let go too quickly before giving the person a chance to shift their behaviours.
Below is what I have learnt and teach others.
When you give a person a chance to change their behaviours and actions & they haven’t then you have a choice.
This means you have:
identified clearly to them how they could shiftidentified why they would shiftprovided available resources & support to help them shift
Unfortunately many people needing to shift to improve their relationship, productivity, results, engagement, care more about being heard & understood and do not actually want to change...they are exactly where they say they do not want to be or refuse to acknowledge they are. They distort, deflect, blame and complain.
This only devalues the support network provided, delays your own growth, self worth, engagement, productivity, opportunities and keeps the person not wishing to change, in a position of empowered control & inflexibility.
If a person holds on and does not show any interest in complying, then they have broken trust.
There is no reason to continue to remain in distrust when you seek to gain and give trust. It is detrimental to your self value.
If a person is not trustworthy they have violated the relationship.
It is painful to realise however essential to know your own boundaries and reinforce parameters should it ever occur again. In essence it is saying “I am worthwhile, my sincerity is real and worthwhile, I have values, beliefs and considerations”
You cannot make people into something they are not, it is therefore time to reflect on your boundaries, and invest in those including yourself who will clearly demonstrate trust in you and growth in themselves.
How would you like your experience to be ?
What would letting go mean to you
What could you Be, Do, Have, Create
What would that give you - what example would you be setting and providing
How does this appear in your life ?
If it matters to You : it matters to Me
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